


The Lopez Manifesto

by wolfwars



Category: Glee
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 03:20:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16526348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfwars/pseuds/wolfwars
Summary: santana starts writing a rachel/quinn fanfic for everyone at McKinley. it’s also extremely popular as everyone awaits her weekly updates. (usually based on what the girls are doing that week.) quinn is the last to find out and is… pissed.





	1. 1. Berry Is the Warmest Color

**Author's Note:**

> Notes: lol hello I’m going to apologize in advance because I DEFINITELY DO NOT REMEMBER EVERY PLOT POINT THAT WAS GOING ON IN THE EARLY SEASONS. I’m probably going to get a bunch of stuff wrong so maybe let’s just pretend this is an AU of sorts, lol. A memory-based AU. Also, I use a lot of vernacular that wasn’t used or invented back then so this is also an anachronism AU.

Rachel Berry knew something weird was going on. For one, McKinley High was too quiet and that never happened. McKinley didn’t have eyes in the middle of hurricanes, it only had hurricanes. She walked along the familiar halls expecting to see a fight, or a sing-along, or maybe even Sue trying to make Mr. Shue cry again… but nothing.

Rachel walked past Finn and Sam practicing their secret handshake. _Ok. So no drama there._ Sam swooshed around and made light saber sounds as he pretended to cut across Finn’s imaginary light saber. Both boys pretended to fight each other then laughed. 

“Look Rach! Our handshake’s the best.”

Rachel gave a friendly nod in agreement but kept walking to the next suspects: Kurt, Tina, and Artie.

Kurt was showing off photos of Blaine on his phone. And Artie saw a photo of the ex-Warbler in just his swim suit and did a pretend: hubba! hubba! While playfully swatting Kurt’s arm. It was sweet, but also not worrying. 

_Mercedes and Puck?_

She found them in the library calmly studying for a test. _This was getting crazy._ Glee Club was fine, but it was _too_ fine.

“Have you seen Brittany and Santana?” Rachel asked them. 

They both shrugged, but Rachel had to bet their was some Brittana thing happening. There always was. Except right now, Brittany and Artie had broken up so the two of them seemed perfectly fine. Still, she went to go look for them just in case. 

Santana and Brittany were making out in the auditorium. Santana didn’t even have to remove her eyes (or her lips) from Brittany’s to wave her away. _How does she know I’m even here?_ Rachel wondered. _Santana’s eyes were closed!_ She slowly backed away after Santana muttered—in-between—kisses: “Get out, Berry.”

This left only one person. The one person, she didn’t want to encounter at all much less… ‘check in on.’ But something really weird happened when she walked up to Quinn’s locker. She saw people were pulling their phones out and recording, or taking photos then walking away laughing.

“Huh?” 

“They’re my favorite couple,” a freshman mumbled, excitedly to her friends AS IF RACHEL wasn’t RIGHT THERE to hear her. _What on Earth were they talking about?_

“Here to carry her books, Berry?” A senior football team player asked her. Rachel just blinked, more confused than ever.

“Wait!” She called after him. 

The boy stopped and waited for her to come over. 

“Why did you say that?” 

The boy, who she sorta-knew because of Finn, pulled out his phone and pulled up a website for her:

 

_Chapter One:_

_Berry Is The Warmest Color_

By yours, truly Santana Lopez.

 

“Ok, what is this?” Rachel was major leagues confused. 

“Can I have my phone back?” 

“No!”

 

******

 

_‘Quinn and Rachel looked longingly across the room at one another until Quinn went to Glee, then she stared longingly at Gayberry as she sung a solo of ‘Right Thurr’ to the overly-excited, maybe even drooling, blonde._

_She leant over and sing: ’I know you popular, but you gon' be famous today,’ as if it were an old-timey ballad. Then Berry swooped into the chair next to Q, to serenade her.’_

Rachel gasped. “What!?!”

She had found the story again (with minimal google-searching) and her mind was now going into overdrive as she tried to race through _thirty-seven chapters! THIRTY SEVEN!_ Of Santana’s writing project. Except, ‘project,’ ‘writing,’ No… Rachel wasn’t sure what this was.

_‘I like the way you do that right thurr (right thurr) Lick your lips when you're talkin', that make me sturr.’ Quinn blushed as the brunette suggestively licked her lips.’_

 

“This can’t be real. I can’t really be reading this right now.”

“What are you reading—” Sam asked, peeking over her shoulder. _“Oh no.”_

Rachel swirled around to look at him. 

“You found it.” The boy wiped at his head and bowed it sheepishly. She had to ask. She was scared to but she _had_ to:

“Who else knows about it?” 

Sam gave her a sympathetic smile. “Everyone?”

 

******

 

Everyone was ‘almost-everyone.' It wasn’t Quinn. 

It wasn’t Quinn until third period and Rachel found out as soon as _she_ found out because there was a loud, screaming voice yelling: _SANTANA_ throughout the halls. 

Rachel had been still in binge-read mode. Leaning up against her own locker and frantically trying to catch up to the rest of the school.

Then the angry cheerio locked her eyes on her.

_“You.”_

_“Quinn!”_ Rachel yelped and tried to push herself even more into her locker, in an impossible dream of Houdini-like escaping. But Quinn, charged straight to her and grabbed her arms with with both her hands and pressed down hard. She was FURIOUS.

“Did—”

“No!” She squeaked.

“How—”

“I _just found out!_ ” Rachel was almost pleading, “I didn’t do this! This is just as bad for me as it is for you.” 

Quinn scanned her up and down. 

“Doubtful.” 

“Hey Q!” Shouted a dude neither of them had ever seen in their lives. “Save some of that for the bedroom!”

Quinn growled, then released the scared brunette out from her grip. Rachel slumped backwards, and then quickly straightened up and fixed her crumbled sleeves. 

“I’m coming back for you later.” Quinn threatened, running away. 

“God.” 

Rachel kinda wished she could go back in time a day when things were still boring. 


	2. Chapters & Cheerios

> _‘Quinn stalked behind Rachel, angrily. ‘Hey, Rupaul!’_
> 
> _Brit-Brit turned to S, and said, ‘Rupaul and Rachel are both so pretty…’_
> 
> _‘Treasure trail!’ the blonde yelled even louder, dead-set on getting the dwarf’s attention. Finally it worked, and Rachel met her face-to-face in front of everyone in the choir room._
> 
> _‘You may think your flawless skin and hair, and beautiful eyes and nose and lips and body are enough to get you away with everything, but I see right through you Quinn Fabray: You’re just a scared little girl in the inside.’_
> 
> _Quinn quivered._
> 
> _‘And you don’t know who or what you want, so you take it out one me.’ (And not in the way we all thought she would, amirite?)_

 

 

> _Q acted all offended. ‘Shut it, Berry!’ she growled out, in a way that was clearly fueled-by-lust. Her eyes were all over Berry, like the argyle all over Rachel’s uglyass sweater—’_

 

Quinn chased Santana down, right as the girl and her gf were on the way to the cafeteria.

Rachel had sorta hoped she’d miss this part. But, she didn’t… she figured Quinn would beat up Santana or plot some other evil scheme. Whatever the blonde felt like that day, but she was really, really thinking it might happen when Rachel wasn’t around to witness it.

“Wanna throw hands?!!!! COME ON, puta!” 

“I’m going to destroy you!” Quinn pushed her into the lockers but then Santana tackled her down to the floor. They actually looked like regular, ole’ siblings for a second, because Santana then used her body weight to sit on top of her and slap her whirling hands away. Rachel could just as easily see how this would devolve into a game of ‘Why are you hitting yourself?’

“YOU THINK YOU CAN BEAT ME? I’m Khaleesi! Fire cannot kill a dragon!” Santana smacked more of her hands away and laughed evilly.

_“What the hell are you even talking about?”_ Quinn tried to slap her face, but Santana easily caught it and just as Rachel predicted…made her slap herself with it. Quinn winced, but not from pain but embarrassment.

“Khaleesi stop!” Brittany pouted.

Rachel just watched the whole thing go down with her jaw open and with one arm clutching onto Kurt for some type of moral support he’d never provide—and Kurt, well, he was filming for his beauty vlog. “Quinn and Santana are on the floor, Santana wrote a porn about her—”

“Kurt… not now.” Rachel whispered, primly.

Quinn shoved until she got Lopez off of her, then was lunging again—until Puck caught her and lifted her up in the air. Where she dangled helplessly, still trying to kick the (too) far away enemy. 

On the other half, Blaine intervened (and got slapped _really hard_ in the face for it.) Kurt gasped. “Get your hands off of him!”

“As hot as that was,” Puck said, “You guys will have to do your—” * _Cat hissing sounds*_ , “Laters.” 

“Ugh, Puck.” 

“Quinn and Santana! Talk about this! Use your words!” Rachel whined.

“Why would you do this?” Quinn screamed at Santana, and Rachel felt a pang in her heart. She sounded so _hurt_. And maybe even looked a little scared underneath all that crazy super-rage.

“I’m just giving the people what they want, Q!” 

“It is really good,” Brittany said. 

“Aw, Brit.” Santana gave her a quick look of adoration.

But Quinn was still pissed: “Nobody wants _that._ ”

“Yeah?” Santana flicked her eyebrows up at Quinn, suggestively. ‘Like, _don’t_ _you_ _want that?’_ Which made Quinn (somehow) even more murderous.

“I’m GOING TO KILL YOU!”

Santana laughed.

“You’ll never be able to show your face in McKinley High again. You’ll be homeschooled after I’m done with you!”

“I would love to see you try.” 

“You will see me try.” 

“Guys!” Puck pulled Quinn even further away. “Y’all need to stop whatever sync-up you’re having right now and chillax.” 

“No. Because she’s going to take it down!”

“Never!”

“Please take it down, Santana.” Rachel joined in. Quinn shot her a look, then turned back to Santana. 

“We’re not asking,” she growled.

“Sorry, babes. But you ain’t got nothing on me,” Santana pretended to feel bad for them, “You’ll just have to learn to deal. Because Auntie Snix is riding this bad boy out to the end and then some.” 

Her smiled turned very, very evil and Rachel found herself looking at Quinn, hoping of all hopes that she had a plan.

 

 

*************

 

But a week later and the story was still up. And everyone was still reading it. Rachel was surprised by how positive the comments were, it was all: _Aw, I always wondered about those two._ Or: _I saw Rachel and Quinn fight in the halls once and I was sure they were about to hook-up, Quinn looked turned on._

It was kind of alarming. Rachel knew how Kurt was treated at this school only a few years back, and Glee was involved in expanding the minds and hearts of the student body… Santana and Brittany were a pretty visible couple, so were Blaine and Kurt, but she didn’t think they’d become active participants in a love conspiracy theory.

The real issue wasn’t the jokes, the flowers teasingly given to both her and Quinn and addressed from one another (though Quinn had thrown hers in the trash and demanded that slushies be thrown at anyone who’d even _looked_ at her locker), or the feedback on the blog. 

The problem was Glee Club. Everyone was fighting all the time now. When Schue announced they’d be doing duets of love songs/club songs mash-ups, Quinn had run out of the room. 

“But don’t you want to do ‘Pony/Come What May’ with Berry!?” Santana yelled after her. 

 

“I hate that story,” Rachel said, sinking her head into her hands. Tina then politely poked her.

“ _Technically_ it’s a fanfic.” 

Tina gave her a pat on the back. Everyone was being nice and supportive, but it was still a lot.

 

The next day, Santana walked behind Quinn who was ignoring everyone in the hallways and reading on her phone.

“I would skip chapter 16, Quinn. There’s some shit in there you’re not ready for,” Quinn’s cheeks went red but her eyes said ‘I’ll murder you.’ Santana gripped the lapels of her cheerios jacket and went along on her usual cocky strut, unphased, “Huge crowd pleaser though.”

 

“What the hell, Santana!? What are you trying to do!” Quinn looked like she was about to jump her (again) so Rachel calmly intervened, putting a hand against Quinn to hold her back from killing McKinley’s new queen of erotic literature. 

“Why _did_  you do this?” Rachel asked too, since she was also sincerely confused. She knew Santana liked to mess with Quinn, but writing a 50,000k+ story about her and…oh…the ex-head cheerleader  _being… together_? Rachel’s face almost burned as bad as Quinn’s just had when she thought about it again.  _If she wants to drive Quinn Fabray crazy, her plan is certainly working_. Rachel gnawed at her bottom lip nervously.

Quinn took Rachel’s hand off her chest and aimed a truly terrifying stare right into Lopez’ uncaring eyes. “THIS. ENDS.  **NOW**.”

“Nah, little homie. McKinley would riot! This thing’s got epic view counts. There’s even some fan art of the time you fireman carried Berry out of the burning celibacy club and left Mr. Shue to die in her stead.”

Rachel’s mouth fell open.

“But to answer shorty’s question,” Lopez crossed her arms proudly, “I got the idea watching you two throw down in the hallway one day. I went home, got my laptop out, basically just typed down everything I saw… and who knew? McKinley high has a whole slew of people who’ve been waitin for the dork–” Santana quickly bonked Rachel’s nose, “And the repressed christian bitch to F-U-C–”

“STOP!” Quinn clutched her textbooks desperately to her chest like it might transform into some parachute and shoot her out of this conversation. 

“Anyways,” Lopez smirked, “I’m filling a real void here, just like Quinn filled Berry’s void in chapter 16. But, you keep doin’ you, Q.” 

Then Santana turned around on her heel and bounced off. Brittany saw her walk by and immediately joined her, leaving Rachel and Quinn behind and really leaving poor Rachel, in the dust of Quinn’s very, very, very, veryangry meltdown. 

“I can’t believe–how fucking dare she????” Quinn gripped her books then started to violently shove them into her backpack, as she growled, “ _You_?  _Me?_ Who does she think she is?!?” She tossed the bag away, immediately forgetting about it. ( _I hope she comes back for that later, she has a Math test in her honors class tomorrow,_  Rachel thought to herself. Then she wondered how she even knew that.) 

“ _ME_?  _DATE YOU_?!” Quinn’s hands went up in the air in pure frustration, “We don’t even  _like_ each other.”

“Actually,” Rachel took a step forward. She tried to stay as calm as possible in the hopes that Quinn might calm down too, “I do like you.” 

“No, no, no, no. You like Finn. And then I took him from you. Then I took Puck from you?” Quinn looked into her eyes, searchingly. “You hate me.”

“I don’t. And…” Rachel looked up nervously, Quinn’s heart fluttered at the worried way her eyelashes batted up at her, “I haven’t for a while now.” 

“Whatever, Berry!” She exclaimed. Then she stormed off. Rachel picked up her abandoned backpack and dropped it off in the assigned seat of her next class for her before going to her own class period.  



	3. No Mas

_‘The blonde Cheerio went to the school library and got on one of those old hackneyed desktops the school should really have replaced by now and opened up a word document. Then angrily, she typed._

_‘Glee… List…’ The pent up blonde erased that then fixed it: ‘Glist.’_

_‘This will show her,’ Fabgay mumbled weirdly to herself as she made a list of Glee’s hottest members: herself at the top and the diva muppet at the bottom. But hey! She got something (almost) right, since Santana Lopez, clearly the_ ** _hottest_** _member of Glee Club, was #2. And it wasn’t because the beautiful, outspoken best friend of Quinn Fabgay was sitting next to her laughing maniacally at the whole plot and telling her to put her name there_.  


_‘Now what?’ The actual-hottest member, Lopez asked. She twirled a jolly rancher around in her mouth, bored outta her damn mind._

_‘Put it on Rachel’s locker, of course.’ The Cheerio gave her usual, villainous half-smirk and looked into Santana’s eyes like she’d just come up with the declaration of independence or something and not just a doofy list of names where she listed herself as the hottest. Quinn’s obsession was… interesting to her, but it was hard to follow along what the blonde actually thought would happen. Why was she trying to clue Rachel into the fact that she was hot? Didn’t Rachel already_ **_know_ ** _she’s hot? I mean, Santana could tell by the way Berry made her Berry goo-goo eyes so often in Fabgay’s direction she might as well have been wearing a shirt that said ‘free candy!’ and sometimes Santana could legit not tell if Berry was dreamy-eye staring down Finn OR Quinn, the girl on his arm._

_She checked on her manicure while Quinn babbled on about one thing or another, and thought about it… perhaps, Fabgay just didn’t_ **_know_ ** _Rachel_ **_knew_ ** _that Quinn was hot? So she needed an urgent updating of such facts immediately?’ On her locker though? So unsubtle.’_

Rachel huffed loudly in front of her computer. Was this even a  _fanfic_ , or a freakin’ memoir!  _No scratch that,_  Rachel thought,  _it’s an incriminating confessions of the duo’s misdeeds._ And it was a lot to wrap her head around. She closed the laptop, done with her ability to keep stomaching Satan-a’s sloppy prose, and also lost in her own memories of the incidents revolving around the G-list. 

She found it, but not on her locker. So Santana’s story must have added that part? It had been taped where anyone can see it. And didn’t Quinn Fabray make it entirely clear  _exactly how good-looking she thinks Rachel is?_  She was dead last! But, why was Santana saying that Rachel checked Quinn out? Never! She Never Ever Did That.

Rachel immediately asked herself though _: Do I do that? No. No._ She reasoned out that she only stared at Quinn when Quinn stared at her. Which, was… was  ** _that_**  a lot?!

“Oh god, I need to talk to someone about this immediately or I might explode.” But she couldn’t talk to her parents about it, or Schue, or maybe not even Finn. And she couldn’t talk to Quinn because Quinn might put her in the cheerio cannon and shoot her off to her death.   


 

 

*******************

 

“Santana!”   


“What’s up?” Santana casually slung her backpack over her shoulder and picked up the slurpy she had on the table in front of her. 

“On chapter 15, line 804 you said–”

But Rachel stopped in shock when Santana threw the contents of the slurpy at some boy on their walk and orange syrup went flying everywhere. 

Santana looked at her and shrugged. “Not everything revolves around you, Berry. Now continue.”

Rachel shut her mouth and went back to the printed out pages she had in her hands. “ _Rachel’s clearly gots it bad for the bad girl.”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“_ What did you mean by that?” 

Santana laughed and then spelled it out for her, “That you, Rachel Berry, gots it bad for Quinn. What’s the part you don’t understand?”

“Did I actually stare her down in hard in AP Bio that you thought I was going to…to…” 

“Climax on the spot?” Santana chuckled at remembering the words of her work. She loudly smacked her hands together, trying to get rid of any orange residue left over from her hallway attack, then took Rachel’s arm through hers in a fake sign of being confidantes. “Look, Rachel Maddow, everyone knows writers like to  _embellish the details_ , right?” Then her face changed like she’d just remembered a detail, “But, actually  _that_ happened.”

“Wait–you aren’t even in AP Bio. You don’t have the grades.” Rachel growled out accusingly.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, I have spies.  _Everywhere_.”

“It was Mercedes.” Rachel stopped mid-step, stuck in horrible realization, “Mercedes also thinks I’m in love with Quinn Fabray?”

Rachel could have sworn she saw a tiny second of sympathy flash on the fanfic writer’s face, but it didn’t matter… she was off to confront another person today and finally get some answers! 

 

 

 

_*********************_

 

  _‘‘I’m head captain of the cheerios, leader of the celibacy club, definitely the hottest girl in the school and there used to be a time I–where I could have_ **_any_ ** _guy I wanted. So, tell me, why on Earth would I ruin all of that just to stoop down to the level, of dating Rachel frickin’ Berry!!?!!!’_

 

_I don’t sound like that_. Thought Quinn, as she bitterly scrolled through the story on her phone. It was probably her 100th time trying to read the chapter. Every time she started reading she got overwhelmed and had to turn off the offending material.

‘ _I know,’ whispered Rachel, ‘You would never fall for a loser like me.’_  


“Rachel would never feel that way!” Real Quinn argued to the screen.  _Rachel thinks she’s a 100x better than everyone._ And plus, it was obvious to Quinn that unlike all the Lima Losers, Rachel was going to get out of this town and make something of herself. Quinn and Finn would get married, pop out some annoying brats and continue on the miserable cycle.  _Ugh,_  she thought,  _Rachel’s literally got the whole world in her hands_. And, Quinn… Quinn had nothing.

_‘Quinn’s eyes softened. She stuffed her shaky hands into the pockets of her Cheerio’s varsity and refused to look the brunette in the eyes. When the shorter girl noticed, she shuffled away sadly, but Quinn didn’t see it. She could only hear her light footsteps trail away and then disappear. And she felt a heavy thud in the pit of her stomach that squeezed and clenched guiltily. Why did it have to be Rachel freakin’ Berry who always made her feel this way?’_

Quinn clenched her jaw tight. Shit. Shit. Shit. 

How come this part… Santana totally nailed? 

She thrust the phone away quickly and tried to take a deep breath. 


	4. Noted

‘ _Quinn tries to get her grind on, but Rachel clucks her tongue at her disapprovingly. Waving her finger in the air, Berry says, ‘What did you tell me… was it… ‘It’s all about the teasing, and not about the pleasing’?’ Then the argyle-strapped diva queen gave a throaty laugh to the beyond-perturbed, Queen Bee. Quinn groaned so loud it practically became a moan. The sound was unholy.’_  


_“_ Jeez, Santana.”  Rachel puffed.

Quinn frowned, feeling her chest tighten. She also felt like squirming in her seat all the sudden, and like she was breathing harder than normal-or at least breathing harder then when they started the chapter. Quinn glanced to the very-still, very freaked Berry sitting next to her and at Kurt, who crooked an eyebrow up at the passage:

“This whole homoerotic travesty is making me wonder if Santana’s in love with  _both_  of you. She said Rachel’s got ‘legs for days and an ass that makes angel cry’!!!!” Kurt said, distressed.

“I think she’s just trying to ruin my whole entire life.” 

“If you say ‘whole’ you don’t need to say ‘entire,’ Quinn. It’s redundant.”  The already-angry girl glared into Rachel’s direction and very pointedly rolled her eyes so she had to watch. 

Mercedes cleared her throat and continued on.

_‘‘Yeah, but then you said you liked sex. ‘Girls want sex just as bad as guys do.’ Remember?’ Q looked a little desperate, but that wasn’t unusual. When Rachel had said that at Celibacy Club, she actually looked confused. She turned to her friends later, the most beautiful and lovely Brittany and the hilarious AF Santana and said, ‘What does that scheming brat think she’s doing coming in there and trying to give everyone boners!? And what did she mean, ‘girls get turned on as much as boys do.’ She’s full of it! I’ve done everything but third and could always contain myself.’_

_Lopez let out a laugh that was more like a mocking snort and gave the Blonde a serious, ‘_ **_are you fuckin with me?’_ ** _look. Brittany looked at her pityingly._

_‘It’s OK Quinn, maybe Finn’s just a really bad kisser or something? Do you want to kiss me? Or–oh wait, Santana’s the bestest kisser ever! Why don’t you kiss her?’ The way their bossy friend looked was as if Brittany had offered to push her off a cliff. Santana made kissy faces at her as she ran away in the opposite direction like Quinn always does–”_  


“I DO NOT ALWAYS RUN AWAY.” Quinn exclaimed, almost knocking the laptop out of Mercedes hands, which Rachel thought might be her subconscious way of trying to stop the read-along altogether. Rachel looked at her just as sympathetically as Brittany had, and when she turned her head around to see the rest of the room’s reactions, it was sad-pity faces all around. Kurt even reached out to put a hand over Quinn’s but she tugged it away before he could reach it.

“Finn’s a good kisser,” Rachel said softly. He wasn’t as good as Jesse or Puck, but he sure wasn’t  _bad_.

“Santana’s a liar!” Quinn snapped. Then she looked pointedly at everyone in the room, “If you tell a single soul at this school I will destroy you. I will destroy Glee Club, I will burn your families to the ground–”

“Woah, woah, Quinn,” Mercedes soothed, “Don’t let Lopez get to your head like this. It’s what she wants.”

The Cheerio gave a terse nod in agreement but kept her eyes trained to the floor. 

“Look Quinn, we know the truth, right?” The brunette gleamed as she looked at her cheerfully, “You didn’t get turned on when I said that.”

“N-no! No! I didn’t!” 

“Ok, well maybe it’s good she’s writing this. We can both finally clear the air,” Rachel smiled at her extra-hopefully, “I’m sorry I said that stuff at the club. It wasn’t respecting the rules even though I think celibacy is wrong and abstinence only is clearly detrimental to the greater sexual health of our student body and is proven to be a terrible system for–”

Quinn’s eyes went wide. Mercedes just shook her head knowingly at Berry until she quieted and squeaked out a quick,  _“Sorry.”_

“It’s not like I think about you saying that.” Quinn quickly relayed.

“Yeah, I know.”

“You were just saying it to turn on Finn anyway, right?”

Rachel kind of nod-shrugged.

“And, because you were a pathetic loser who could only use sex to get boys to ever notice you, right? So Finn would want to ‘push up on you’ during the slutty dance number?” 

Rachel saw red. Mercedes whistled, grabbed Kurt and ran off into a BOLT. Shit was going down. Now Quinn was the one smiling, and very evilly–clearly enjoying herself as she stared at Rachel’s upset face. She didn’t mean to just poke the bear but to joust into it at 60 mph and she’d succeeded.

“What’s your problem!?!” 

“You. You’re my problem. Somehow you’re always my problem!” Quinn stepped out of her seat and stood imposingly over the sitting girl until Rachel stood up to meet her. Quinn laughed dryly,  _you’re still too short pipsqueak_  she thought, and she hovered even closer, hazel eyes baiting the girl to try her. “Rachel. Rachel. EVERYWHERE! Somehow  _you._ are. always. my problem!”

“I’m sorry that I’m so much trouble for you.” Rachel said, sarcastically. What really was Quinn’s problem with her? The Rachel and Finn happened awhile ago and Quinn didn’t even seem to EVER really care about him? She didn’t mind cheating on Finn. She treated him like a prop!

Rachel started packing her belongings away. There was no reason for her to stay and take this. But Quinn grabbed her backpack away from her. 

“You’re done here, when I say you’re done here.”

“I’m not a cheerio, Quinn. You don’t get to boss me around.” Rachel tug-a-war-ed the bag back into her possession. She walked to the door, but Quinn (with her longer legs) easily outmaneuvered her. She swiveled around and walked backwards so she could harass Rachel face to face.

“You’re going to pretend like you weren’t coming for what’s mine all sophomore year?” 

“Finn isn’t an object. And not everything I do is about you.”  

“You wanted my friends, my boyfriend, my ex hook-up and  _I’m the one whose obsessed_? Maybe you’re the one who was obsessed with me, Rachel. Why didn’t that occur to anyone?” Quinn pressed her palm against Rachel to keep her from moving. “Admit it, Rachel.”

“Admit what?” 

This was genuinely confusing her. Rachel, totally over this dumb fight, walked to the door even if she had to walk forwards into Quinn to do it. And they did that until Quinn’s back hit the door. And to her credit, Rachel was impressed Quinn didn’t make a single face of acknowledgement. Her shiny eyes were too intensely tearing into Rachel’s face to care.

Rachel deadpanned, while trying to reach for the door handle, “Yeah. I’m in love with you. Everybody is. Finn would never have left you on his own, I put my big slutty spell on him to keep him away from you.” 

“ _Berry_.” 

“Can I leave?” Rachel stared at the exit so close yet so far away, “Or do you want this to become Santana’s Chapter 38?” 

The blonde looked afraid for a second, but then Quinn tried to pretend like she was still too good for all of this. 

She resolutely glared at Rachel then slumped just enough away to free the entranceway. Rachel took a deep breath, relieved this was over. “I just wanted to be your friend. I’ve always wanted to be your friend.”

“I don’t want to be your friend.”

“Yeah,” she said, sounding defeated, “I know.”   


 

 

*****************

 

 

 

Kurt, Mercedes, Santana and Brittany all decided to hold a secret meeting after school. They sat on the bleachers staring into the empty field down below and planning on how to fix things for Glee Club. Blaine came too, but only because he wanted to go to The Lima Bean with Kurt afterwards.

“What really made you do this, Santana? Because I’ve seen Quinn go through a lot in the past year and a half, and yet never seen her lose her shit like this.” 

Santana cracked a knowing grin.

“Look. If I-Q doesn’t want me to write a story where she’s gay and head over heels for Rachel Cherry then maybe she shouldn’t act like she’s gay and heads over heel for her.” 

“That’s not a defense!” Kurt told her sternly.

Brittany tugged at Santana’s sleeve and flashed her a bright smile. “I think it’s good, Santana. I really liked chapter sixteen and the chapter where we’re all dancing together at the club and the ten pages of Sam body-rolling.”

Santana smiled smugly, “See. I deliver.”

Mercedes, was still not buying it all, “I know. We’ve talked about this before and I agreed with you that they definitely have something-something brewing underneath all that...” 

“Eye-fucking?”

“Tension,” Mercedes corrected but continued on, “I just don’t want Quinn to kill anyone or to die from her own levels of stress. Girl is cracked.”

“She’s keyed up,” Santana agreed. “But, this is totes unfair to me, because actually. I’ve left soooo so many things out.” 

“Like the naked drawings in the bathroom,” Brittany nodded sagely, “Rachel looked so hot in those cartoon nudes.”

“I didn’t mention that Quinn’s the only person in this school who’d watch every single one of Rachel’s singing videos. Which Rachel didn’t post links to so Quinn must have cyber-stalked Berry to find those... or, that she complains about her to me and Brit like  _every day_. ‘How do I torture Rachel?!’ ‘What did Rachel say about me to Finn?’ ‘I can’t believe Rachel did that!’”

“Or that fantasy where we all danced in Quinn’s mind in sexy jerseys and humped the tackle bags for her.” Brittany said to a room of bewildered eyes.  _In Quinn’s MIND?_

“Brit.” Santana looked at her sweetly, but also a tinge concerned.

“What?” The blonde looked clueless.

“Quinn and Sam kiss,” Kurt said, “I see them kiss in the hallways.”

“Yeah, a quick peck. Excuse me, if I find it weird she never lets a boy touch her junk top or bottom, or ever has touched a boy’s junk. She’s lesbi-gay and most likely lesbi-gay for Rachel Berry, and it’s the only way any of this makes sense. Because I know for a fact, she never gave two craps and a lawn chair about Puck or Finn or even Sam. And Sam’s near perfect.”

“Or, she’s just very Christian.” Mercedes said. But it was too late. Blaine, Kurt, and Brittany were all nodding their heads like: yeah, she’s gay.

“What about Puck? They had sex.”

Santana rolled her eyes at the mention of Puck. “She had sex with Puck and then was done forever, plus I’ve had sex with Puck. And, yet.” Santana motioned around her.

“And she’s gay.” 

“They got my point, Brit.”

“Well she does hate Rachel more than anyone else at this school. More than Puck who got her pregnant or Finn who cheated on her. Even I’ve figured that out from my time here.” Blaine smiled politely at the Glee Club members.

“Quinn’s major surface area is below deck. Like an ice burg. On top, she’s the ‘mean girl’ from every high school dramedy but below that she’s an honor roll nerd with two terrible parents and a control kink.” 

“Rachel though?” Mercedes and Kurt both looked at each other doubtfully.

“We like what we like,” Santana said looking only at Brittany.   


 

 

 

****************************

 

 

 

**text to Quinn, 8:50pm:** Hey. ~ R.

**text to Quinn, 8:51pm:** I know you don’t like me or want to be my friend. That’s... fine. But I have an idea. ~ R.

**text to Rachel, 10:00pm:**  What?

**text to Quinn, 10:02pm:** Come meet me at my house after school tomorrow. ~ R.

**text to Quinn, 10:02pm:** Please. ~ R.

**text to Rachel, 10:02pm:** Rachel.

**text to Quinn, 10:03pm:** Yeah? 

**text to Rachel, 10:04pm:**  I don’t need you to keep signing your name. I know it’s you.

**text to Quinn, 10:04pm:**...ok.

**text to Quinn, 10:04pm:**  noted.   


 


	5. Sin Till You Win

Quinn waited outside the door with her hands nervously moving at her sides. She hadn’t felt like she could stand or sit still all day. Her whole body was strung out and even after doing like a thousand things in Cheerio’s practice, she was still on edge.

The door opened, and a bright-faced Rachel welcomed her in eagerly. She also looked like she’d just worked out since she had her hair in a messy pony, and her skin was sweating and Quinn could see  _a lot_  of skin for once since she was in a camisole and workout leggings. The extra time she spent looking made her feel immediately self-conscious again. Santana would have a field day, wouldn’t she?  _Quinn Fabgay leered over at Rachel’s breasts! Quinn imagined running her hands and tongue all over the sweaty skin_. Quinn immediately wanted to slap herself for where that was heading. Santana wasn’t even writing it! But damn. She was in her head. Doing her Lopez magic.

“Do you want any water? You must be thirsty after practice?” Rachel guided her to the kitchen and grabbed her own water bottle that was covered in cute designs.

_Weird. Because Rachel always works out first thing in the morning_. Quinn thought. And then she imagined Santana, devil over her shoulder, asking her how or why she even knew that and Quinn felt like punching a wall. OR. Santana.

“No. I want to know what your plan is.” Quinn said, trying to get rid of anymore distractions of the Rachel-variety.

“Oh. Sure.” Rachel stopped sipping her drink and sat down on one of the stools around the kitchen island. Quinn hated to admit it but her Dads did a great job. The place was really cute. It wasn’t dollies and Christ-Couture like her place. There was no Jesus Christ portrait looming over the couch. No cheesy, hand stitched, “Strive for Perfection,” Judy might as well have added, “QUINN!” underneath to.

_We couldn’t be any more different if we tried. I have fashion sense, Rachel has no sense. I’m Christian. She’s Jewish. I’m tall, blonde, and pale. She’s short, brunette, and tan. My parents don’t support the ‘gay lifestyle’ and she has two gay dads. She’s adopted. She can sing in a way I never could._ Quinn self-consciously swiped some of her own hair out of her eyes and looked at Rachel, waiting.

Rachel took a deep breath then said super quickly.

“We should read the whole thing together. And right now.”

“NO.”

“You’re letting it effect you, Quinn! You’re getting really mean again.” Rachel started walking over to her and Quinn was half-fight, half-flee mode already. She let the girl look seriously into her eyes, “We have to know what’s on there and find a way for it to not bother us anymore.”

“I’m n-not bothered!” Quinn said, sounding totally bothered.

Berry gave her a reassuring arm touch. She felt herself melting into it as Rachel ran her hands up and down comfortingly. Quinn’s heart thudded and she looked away. “I  _can’t_.” 

“It’s just words, right? It can’t hurt us.” 

Quinn wants to say,  _it hurts me_. But she can’t.

“Quinn, you’re the strongest girl at McKinley. And we both can’t take it too seriously, because it’s Santana writing it.” Rachel gave her a soft smile then headed upstairs to her room. Quinn took a deep breath then reluctantly followed her. 

“Before we do this,” Quinn looked around the room anxiously, “Is there like a pillow or something I could scream into? I’m pretty sure I’m going to need it at some point.” 

“Sure. Whatever makes you comfortable.” Rachel picked up a pillow with a giant star on it.

“Ok. I’m already uncomfortable.” 

Rachel cracked an amused grin then reached for one of the pillows she sleeps on. She handed it to Quinn who held it against her chest. Rachel thought the whole thing looked pretty cute. Cute and vulnerable. 

(the side of Quinn she rarely got to see, but definitely wanted to see more of.)

“You ready?” 

“No. But yes.” She hid her face by putting it up close to the pillow she was holding onto. Quinn wasn’t sure she’d be able to look at Rachel once while this was going on. She could barely read it when she was on her own with no one around, and now she had an audience of one to take in her every reaction. Even if half of those reactions were loud screaming and cursing and fantasizing about destroying Santana.  _I’m the most feared kid at school. I’m a huge bitch. I’m a bigger bitch than Santana. She can’t scare or push me around. I’m Quinn! Freakin! Fabray._ The more she hid behind the pillow though, the more she realized it smelled 100% like Rachel Berry. Her shampoo, her face when it wasn’t kinda sweaty-glowy like it was now, hair falling over her brown eyes. Quinn didn’t mind the smell but it was distracting. It smelled  _nice_. And it felt so embarrassingly intimate she wished she’d just held onto the dumb star one.

“Chapter one...” The girl begin.

Rachel read through chapter one and two and it was mostly bearable. It was just stuff she already knew. Freshman year stuff. Quinn watched her as she read in her dumb perfect theater narration voice, and the way her throat moved whenever she needed to take a pause and catch her breath. Quinn sat up straighter and twirled the cross around her neck, a little bored. 

“This is so dumb.” She says, pointing to the computer just to clarify she’s not trying to insult Rachel or her plan. 

“Affirmative.” Rachel scooted a little closer to her on the bed so they could both read the screen.

 

_‘Rachel slowly begin to realize they were in all the same classes. She didn’t know who this pretty girl in the red cheerleader’s uniform was, but she must be smart since she was in more honors classes than she was. Maybe that drove her a little crazy…’_

Quinn looked up at Rachel expectantly.

Rachel frowned. “I—”

“Did it drive you crazy?” 

“No! Not ‘crazy,’ more like... curious.” 

‘ _Rachel made a point of it to seek the blonde out and ask her for help in calculus since the cheerleader was clearly the smartest in the class. But at the last minute, she saw Quinn with her totally hot friend squad of ‘hotter than anyone friends’ and totally chickened out. She rushed off in the other direction, scared.’_

“OK,” Rachel said frustrated, “I did think about starting a study group with maybe you and a few other people. But Santana and Brittany weren’t even in our calculus class. Brit was repeating Algebra I. Santana was in Geometry.”

“Yeah,” Quinn said, her smile quirked up as she fondly remembered that time.

“Would you have joined my group?” 

Quinn thought about it, chewing her lip as she mulled it over. “Probably not.”

Rachel sighed and continued onto the next chapters.  _‘Rachel decided to do the most embarrassing thing any new kid who is desperately seeking attention could do. She decided to start a talent show and sing an unasked for solo rendition of ‘Papa, Can You Hear Me?’ in the middle of assembly. Sue Sylvester dragged her off stage mid-song and said ‘This is not a place to exhibit any talent! This is a high school!’ So the next day, Rachel Berry, the scrappy fourteen year-old with dark brows and gangly legs and arms, and who’d just gotten her braces taken off, came back full force to sing ‘Ladies Who Lunch.’”_

Rachel giggled. Quinn couldn’t believe Santana would bring that whole thing back up. Especially after it had taken so long for the student body to let it die. It was definitely the first time she really notice-noticed Rachel Berry and it was also so weird and awkward. Sue was trying to read out stuff about Cheerio auditions and suddenly there’s this new girl skipping into the room with a mic and belting out show tunes. Rachel was trying to recruit people for a talent show or something... Quinn watched now as current Rachel fell down on her back from laughing so hard. 

She threw her other pillow over her face to hide her mortification. 

Quinn took the computer out of the reach of the giggling fit and shuffling limbs and put it where it’d be safe on her lap. She knew what was coming next but somehow was feeling gutsy enough to read it out loud.

‘ _The students at McKinley High started booing her and her surprise show. First the regular students were mocking and jeering and then the football team, and then the cheerios. That was until the girl campaigning for head cheerleader, Quinn Fabray, told them all to shut up._

_‘I’m trying to listen.’ Quinn reprimanded. Her eyes stayed on the performance (aka DISASTER) going on below. The scrawny freshman waving her arms in the air excitedly, and pretending to be a bitter 72-year old woman on the ‘stage’ (AKA gym floor.) Everyone hated it except for her.’_

When Quinn looked up from the screen, Rachel was no longer hiding under her pillow but staring at her wide-eyed.

“You... defended me?” 

Quinn gave a tight nod then kept reading, trying to ignore the dopey faces Berry was making at her now.

‘ _The cheerios quieted and so, the show went on. Santana, the coolest cheerio, tried to throw her water bottle at the stage but Marcy, faithfully following Quinn’s commands, took it out of her hand just in time to save the brunette from a much needed wake-up call.’_

“Yeah, good luck with that,” Rachel huffed, looking amused, “I was fully committed to embarrassing myself in front of everyone and to bringing the joy of theater and song and dance to McKinley High. Ptft.” 

“You were interesting,” Quinn says with no judgement in her voice. And, Rachel quakes at the sincerity in it. _She liked it…?_ The blonde watches her and doesn’t smile or say anything else, but Rachel starts wondering if maybe she had at least one admirer—uh, _enjoyer—_ of her performance that day. Quinn had defended _her._ Her of all people!

_So how’d that change?_

The rest of the chapter was just about Rachel learning the ropes as a freshman. It wasn’t particularly interesting nor accurate Rachel might add, but it was amusing to hear the word: ‘Wanky’ come out of her mouth, when she’s never said that word before in her life. And she’s checked out the cheerleading team but it was like, the time they were all doing that naked car wash with soap and bubbles everywhere and it was distracting and there was more skin than she’d ever seen in her life and she couldn’t _not_ check them all out since there was nowhere else to look.

Rachel yawned and laid back down on her bed. Quinn stifled her own yawn and kept reading through the next chapter.

“How are we going to have sex in chapter 16, when I still haven’t even spoken to you once?” Quinn asks, absent-mindedly. When she looks over at her fellow-reader, Rachel’s blushing.

“Oh… uh…” 

Quinn gulps, “This is chapter five, and still we haven’t—oh here we go.” 

Rachel took a deep breath. _Did she remember how they’d met?_ Rachel couldn’t remember anything except the ‘presence’ of Quinn Fabray, because the girl was a big one on their campus. It felt like whenever the air shifted in the hallway is was just a flock of Cheerios walking in, and Quinn was bossily leading the way. Rachel’s earliest memories are Sue barking orders and the cheerleaders doing extraneous amounts of ‘suicides’ before and after bouts of extreme dieting. Rachel hadn’t liked it then or now.

“Wait—Quinn,” Rachel sits up and stretches her hand out to place it on Quinn’s wrist. “Do you remember how we met?”

“No.” _That was a lie._ Quinn remembers when they met, she also remembers freshman!Rachel’s first day of school and assessing the amount of damage the girl could cause her social life. Which is what Quinn Fabray did with every new person. She didn’t seem like she’d help or hurt her image, so Quinn passed her by until the whole talent show flash mob thing. Then, she _really_ looked.

“Ok, sorry, go on.” Rachel removed her hand and moved so that she was holding her knees against her chest. She had to will herself to not impatiently read ahead since she hadn’t gotten to this part before in her private readings.

“OK.” 

_‘Rachel noticed Quinn Fabray was holding a heavy stack of textbooks and a few extracurricular reads.’_

“I didn’t notice anything like that.” Rachel didn’t know what an avid reader Quinn was until Glee Club, where the girl’s face was now always hidden behind a book. It was pretty adorable. Rachel sometimes wished the boys were that committed to their education. She gave Finn books to read all the time and he just casually tossed them in his gym bag or locker, and never read a single word of them! She asked him to read ‘Pride and Prejudice’ and Finn went out and bought ‘Pride and Prejudice: WITH ZOMBIES.’ Sometimes she worried he’d get a football injury and would be incapable of making it to college, much less one of the finer schools she fully intended on going to. 

‘ _A few extracurricular reads,’_ Quinn got back into the sentence, ‘ _Quinn moved over to her with so much grace and determination it kind of scared her. [And turned her on.]’_

They both rolled their eyes.

_‘And she walked right up to her and confidently said, ‘You seem to be adjusting quite well here.’ The blonde’s voice was practice-perfect. She sounded more like a concerned ‘cool mom’ or a guidance counselor than a fellow student. She was fifteen, but disconcertingly ‘adult.’_

_Rachel felt her neck get hot all the sudden, she fiddled with her hair and smiled up nervously. ‘Thanks.’_

_‘So Rachel,’ Quinn walked alongside her with an easy flow, and Rachel realized she’d never told the girl her name nor did the girl ever tell her hers. Which meant, Quinn just had correctly assumed Rachel would know who she was already.’_

“Wait,” Rachel let her knees go and sidled up next to Quinn. “That. Didn’t happen.” 

“No, it didn’t.” Quinn agreed. 

“Because…” 

“I asked you your name and you asked me mine. And I didn’t sound like some cool adult—”

“Oh God! I remember now,” Rachel shot up, making the bed wiggle with her body as she excitedly leaned forward towards Quinn enough to grab her shoulders, “You were _vomiting_! On the field.” 

Quinn nodded. She was a little startled with the starlet’s excited intensity as she shook her shoulders up and down and left practically _no_ breathing space between them.

“You were running suicides and, and—” Freshman Quinn with red cheeks, blown out pupils, and a messy ponytail crouched over by the bottom of the bleachers vomiting the barely-there contents of her stomach into the dumpster. Rachel, just happened to be walking nearby at the time.

“You held my hair back for me. Then gave me some water and told me to sit down and breathe with you.” 

_Hi. My name is Rachel. What’s yours?_

“I can’t believe I forgot that.” Rachel said.

“I was pushing myself hard. It was the only way Sue would assign me as captain.” 

_I have to go! Quinn started jogging back to the practice._

_What’s your name?_

_Quinn stopped running and turned around._

_Quinn!_

_Good luck, Quinn._

_Thanks._  


Rachel watched Quinn’s eyelashes flutter. She seemed lost in her thoughts like she so often did when she was reading. Rachel remembered the sweaty, panting, vomit-y Quinn from freshman year who seemed a lot easier to talk to. Or at least, introduce herself to. 

“I guess there’s something Santana finally doesn’t know about us,” Rachel smiled. That felt good. Finally something just her and Quinn knew.

“Yeah.” Quinn said, smiling back. 

When the girl looked at her that way AND smiled, Rachel got how all these boys could be total goners for her. Her heart beat a little fast so Rachel implemented her usual breathing techniques, which were perfectly trained for singing and other aerobic activities. 

She knew how badly she wanted to be the girl’s friend, but Rachel was starting to feel like she’d be _devastated_ if they didn’t fix things. She NEEDED the girl to like her, that much she’d already known. But, now, she’d be upset for the rest of her life if they didn’t find a way to go back in time and be the friends they were always destined to be and Rachel knows that sounds dramatic but she’s also so, so right about something this time. Holding onto Quinn’s shoulders and looking into her hazel eyes…feels right. So does being in her space and actually being privy to the thoughts and feelings behind the WALLS OF FABRAY, (for once.)

Rachel’s pretty sure she’s climbed up and down those walls more times than she can count. She’s snuck in, drilled in, and face-planted onto the other side. She catches a glimpse of the true person beneath all the haughtiness and glam. She gets just enough to want more, then is thwarted! Thrown over back to square one, and usually miserable about it. Quinn is like a feral alley cat who is all about the pets one minute, and then the next is scratching the shit out of your arm. For seemingly no reason other than it _pleases_ her.

Rachel blinks and grins huge.

“We have to read more tomorrow.” She decides for both of them.

“I don’t know…” 

“Come on, Quinn.” 

“Rachel—”

The brunette feels her heart flutter at the way the blonde says her name. 

“This is good for us.” Rachel (somewhat reluctantly) released Quinn’s shoulders and fell onto the back of her legs, safely out of the girl’s space, “I’ll trade you a big favor for it.” 

“What kind of favor?” Quinn asked, sudden piqued interest.

“I don’t know. But as Glee Club Members don’t we all always end up needing some?” Rachel really hopes Quinn doesn’t ask her to slushy somebody, or streak in front of the whole school, or eat mud, or kill Santana or something…

“Deal.” Quinn reaches her hand out to shake. Rachel eagerly accepts. 

 

 

******************

 

Rachel finds herself thinking about to freshman year a lot more now. She still can’t help but wonder why or how things changed. Quinn was perfectly polite upon their first encounter. She’d shared the space with the sick girl on the bleachers and it had been nice to be helpful to someone.

And apparently, Quinn had defended her in front of all her friends.

_So, if everyone was mean to me Freshman year, but not until a few months in…why’d she change her mind?_ Rachel hadn’t done anything to court Finn until Sophomore year. She hadn’t done anything, so far as she knew.

And Rachel isn’t sure if she wants to bring it up yet or not, but she definitely knows the first time Quinn was awful to her. She’d had nightmares about the incident for weeks and months after, and when it was time for summer break, she’d been super hopeful maybe the Cheerios and the football team would forget about her over that span of time.

But no… Quinn had only gotten worse.

_And, I still don’t know why._

******************

 

Quinn screamed into the pillow. The sound was thankfully muffled since Rachel’s Dads were both home and trying to sleep, not be disturbed by an un-authorized sleepover to read erotic literature about themselves on her bed…alone at night.

“Are you alright?” Rachel rested a hand on the girl’s back and then slid it up to her shoulder to give a firm squeeze.

“I can’t believe her!” Rachel wished Quinn’s face had stayed buried in her sleeping pillow because the wet, angry eyes that were looking at her now were pretty scary. And this look usually came with a barrage of unnecessary comparisons of her physical attributes to the male form. 

“It’s OK. We _just_ kissed.” 

“I pushed you up against your locker—” Quinn’s face was red. She moved the pillow back to her face to hide.

“It was like, the equivalent of a girl sleeping with the pizza guy, Quinn. It was dumb.” 

“What?” 

“Like… in porn.”

Quinn stared at her, utterly confused. “You watch porn?”

“Ok, Quinn, maybe another night we’ll cover the healthy, natural encounters of my sexual health but I wasn’t, in this case, specifically referencing me. It’s like a cliche. Sexy girl finds sexy guy delivering a pizza and they…” Rachel felt sheepish the more confused of a look Quinn gives her, “Have sex…” 

“So you’re saying us kissing was like a porn?” Her voice was growing angry, “Is that what you’re trying to imply, Berry? Because I’d be careful what words you choose to say next.” 

Rachel felt a chill run through her. _Oh God, she’s scary_. 

“I mean! Santana! Not, it’s not the kiss itself. It was the style. There may as well have been a _‘bow chica bow bow’_ playing.” 

“Bow chica bow bow?” 

“Like in porn.” 

“Ok, how do you know so much about porn, Berry?” Quinn raised a brow, less pissed now, but still totally accusatory. 

“Why are you so interested in whether or not I watch porn, Fabray?” _Two could play this game,_ Rachel decided.

Quinn flushed and immediately sunk her head back into the pillow to scream. Rachel wanted to laugh. It was kind of…funny. But, she also didn’t want to get throttled to death by a Cheerio on her bed for her parents to find. 

“i havetoSjisjsidxmjss.”

Rachel patiently waited for the upset girl to sit back up and talk outside of her pillow. Which she did. “I have to stop. I can’t read any more tonight.”

“You’re just drawing it out. We have to rip it off like a band-aid.” 

“I’m legit going crazy.” Quinn flashed her wild hazel eyes to further demonstrate. The girl was laughing but with no humor in it, and grabbing at her perfect-bun in frustration until strands of hair were sticking out of it. She was in her cheerios’ uniform again, but this time wearing a comfortable hoodie zipped over it like protective armor.

“What’s driving you crazy?” Rachel rolled her eyes, “You’re so repulsed by me that the idea we would ever kiss makes you want to throw up?” 

“No.” 

“Then what? Why can’t we just slog through this. Santana’s writing isn’t good but it’s certainly not the worst I’ve read either.” Berry shrugged.

“On a list of most painful things I’ve done in my life: One is giving birth and losing Beth. Two is reading this monstrosity. And three is the time I re-broke my leg for Sue and the Cheerios.” 

“You couldn’t have broken your leg,” Rachel gasped, “I would have seen it in the hallways.”

“No, because Brittany always stood perfectly blocking my leg from view. I couldn’t appear _weak_ , Rachel.” She said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Twice?”

Quinn nodded, and her tight grip on the pillow was slowly releasing. _So she must be calming down._ Rachel did remember a few months of strange closeness between Brittany and Quinn, but the evil trio always stuck together so it hadn’t been noticeable at the time.

“Quinn Fabray. This can’t possibly be worse than breaking your leg.” She reached out and laid her hand on Quinn’s arm, happy that the girl didn’t take the appendage away before she could. “We’re sitting inside on a warm comfortable bed and reading something a crazy person wrote. Just get comfortable and _relax_.” 

“Ptft.” 

“What relaxes you?”

“Getting revenge.” 

“Settle in, Quinn. Because I’m reading more whether you like it or not.”

Quinn groaned. 

_‘Quinn Fabgay put one hand up the girl’s ugly skirt, and the other around her waist to bring her closer.’_

Quinn double groaned.

‘ _Rachel whimpered into her mouth and it was the best kiss Quinn had ever experienced in her entire life ever. She knew in this moment, that yes. she was gay. So very, very gay. and for Rachel fucking Berry of all people.’_

Quinn made pleading ‘stop’ eyes towards her. 

‘ _She could have kissed her forever and ever. It would have been the only true thing the girl knew. More than what her family knew or her friends knew or even what maybe she herself knew. It was like her body knew—’_

“Rachel—”

_‘Instinctively,’_

But, the laptop was flying out of her hands. Quinn was leaning on top of her and keeping her away from the dreaded reading material. 

“It’s kind of romantic.” Rachel said to the face that was two inches away from hers and gripping her hands so she’d stop trying to wiggle away and retrieve the laptop.

“I’m not into you.” Quinn said, staring deeply at her lips. Her close, close lips. 

“Of course not,” Rachel laughed but it sounded wrong to her. Throaty and nervous. She tried to move her un-pinned legs, but it brought her hips right between Quinn’s legs and made things way, way worse because Rachel was totally, totally feeling something and it was like—really, really making her feel dizzy and senseless in the other girl’s presence. 

“Me either.” 

Quinn’s heart was racing so loud she could hear it pulsing through her ears. She was terrified Rachel would hear it too. 

Rachel let out another awkward, husky laugh and looked up at Quinn like: _when are you going to let me go?_

“I just don’t see you that way.” Quinn said.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” 

“Like. At all.” 

“Mhm.” 

Quinn let go of her hands and then leant down to place a slow, hesitant kiss on the other girl’s mouth. She saw Rachel close her eyes, but hers stayed open. 

The kiss was long and slow, but still soft and skittish. 

_Rachel Berry tastes like chapstick_. _And, she must have brushed her teeth before I got here…_

_Quinn’s leaning over me and kissing me. KISSING ME. Am I fucking imagining this? Oh, my god. Am I the kind of person who just says ‘fucking’ now? ‘fucking’ ‘fucking’ ‘fucking’ quote unquote. Who am I?_

They both were going through a million different thoughts. But then somehow both landed on a similar one: _Fuck it._

_Fuck it_ , Quinn thought. If she was going to hell, she might as well get to enjoy it. 

She pressed her lips down harder and moved the hands she’d been using to hold herself up so that she was carefully leaning over Rachel without resting all her weight on top of her, and wiggled one hand until she was cupping the back of Rachel’s head attentively. 

Then she went in for a longer, deeper kiss. Actually pressing the girl to kiss her back. 

_AND SHE ACTUALLY DID._

Quinn felt her body moving as Rachel wrapped her arms around Quinn’s back and pulled her up, kissing her more and more, then moving to her neck. 

_If she thinks she’s directing this kiss, she’s crazy!_ Quinn yanked brown hair closer to her face and gave her a bossy, open-mouthed kiss. Rachel made sounds Quinn had never heard in her life. And she needed to hear more of them again. _Now!_

She pushed Rachel until she was pressed against the wall behind her bed and when her hot friendenemy held her face and gave her a sweet, almost bruisingly-sweet kiss, Fabray bit her lip. 

Rachel shot her a shocked, but very turned on look and Quinn smirked.

Then she was being pulled back into the girl’s mouth until they both clumsily flopped back down on top of each other—but neither of them minded so much. Rachel’s knee was between her thighs _and that was distracting_. Quinn decided she needed leverage too, so she let her hands roam freely under Rachel’s sleep shirt. Rachel bit her lip to stay quiet, then decided to bite Quinn’s shoulder instead, clutching her close while the blonde methodically went about kissing every stretch of tan skin she could find. 

“ _Quinn_ ,” she said softly, catching the girl’s eyes, she leaned back in. Not so subtly saying: _Kiss me on the lips again, already_. Quinn sadly let go of all the parts of skin not covered by a bra and brought Rachel’s face close to hers. Maybe needy-‘kiss me’ Rachel was going to become a bit of a kink too. 

Rachel looked a little amused when the cross necklace kept hitting her face as she tried to suck a hickey below Quinn’s jaw, totally knowing how fast her heart was beating now that it was pressed on her lips. Quinn shivered, embarrassed but also because she was hella turned on. _Damn, Berry…_

_Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it. Fuck Mom and Dad and Santana too. Fuck me. Fuck praying._ Quinn was enjoying herself too much to relapse into the guilt. 

_I’ll atone tomorrow_.

 

 


	6. Estos Idiotas

_6AM._ MONDAY.

Rachel found the two cheerios she was looking for sitting in the very back of the choir room with their arms wrapped around each other. “Quinn kissed me.”

“What now?” Santana blinked and hopped off the bench with an evil smirk slowly spreading across her face. Brittany peered down at her, super curious. 

“I don’t know who else to talk to...”

“You came to the right place, Rachel.” Brittany smiled at her and got up too. She wrapped her arms around her in a swift, warm hug.

“Yeah the gayest place,” but Santana was way to eager for details to not be pressing Rachel for more T, “OK. So Quinn kissed you?”

“Did you get butterflies?” Brittany poked her playfully in the stomach. “Or volcanoes...” her hand was about to poke somewhere else but Santana successfully swatted it away. 

“B.” She said, pretend-hurt.

“Annyways,” Brittany interlocked her hand with Santana’s, “Was it good?”

“No, B. I wanna know the deets. Did she stick her tongue down your throat? What happened? ‘Cuz I’ve been waiting for this powder keg to blow, but I was kinda worried someone would lose a limb first.” 

“She kissed me.” Rachel still sounded stunned over the whole thing, which Santana thought: Girl, you  _know you’ve read my work! You had to know this was coming._  Plus, it’s obvious balls. It wasn’t like Santana had jumped Brittany the first chance she got (I mean,  _she_   _kinda did_ ) and like, with half the stuff Quinn pulls there’s no way she could resist forever. Santana knew from experience how hard it was to not think about playing tongue tag with the hottie you liked. Really, really liked. 

“Did you provoke her?” Brittany asked.

“No.”

“But did you provoke her?” Santana re-asked.

“I really don’t think so. Unless my presence is provocation.” 

“Sometimes it is,” Santana teased. “For her, and for me.” 

“We were reading your story…”

“OH yeah?” Santana’s brows shot up high. She looked smug AF.

“And we agreed we don’t like each other that way.”

“Uh-huh.” 

“Then she kissed me.”

“Was this your first non-boy kiss?” Brit asked.

“ _Ptft._ I went to _theatre camp.”_ Rachel laughed like the answer was so obvious. Brit flashed Santana a smile like _I_ _knew it!_ But, Santana was unconvinced. 

 

“Theatre camp every summer since I was nine! I was kissed by Rachel Meyerstein and then by Ruth Schreiber, and when I was fifteen, I kissed Franny Rosenberg in an all-girl production of ‘ _Phantom of the Opera._ ’ Quinn’s not the first, but definitely the most memorable.”

 

Brittany turned around so that she could tease Santana. “Rachel’s kissed more girls than you.” 

 

“Whatever. Quality not quantity.” Santana stuck two hands on her hips, “I’ve still kissed half the boy population of McKinley High and you have me beat there too, B.” 

 

“What should I… _do_ , about Quinn though?” Rachel feared she was about to be accosted with angry nicknames and pushed into the hallway every chance Quinn Fabray got. There was a usual pattern to their almost “friendship” and every step they took, there’d be five steps backwards into a dumpster fire.

 

If Quinn went back to tormenting her or, _worse—ignoring her._ She would go into a a vegan ice cream eating crisis spiral and binge-watch ‘The Way We Were.’ Even with the reasoning that maybe Quinn was so awful to her as a defense mechanism to protect herself, her image, (and maybe even her heart? _That’s me being hopeful_ , Rachel moped) It still was painful to lose her acquaintanceship entirely. Her mind could say: Look, she’s just doing this because she’s scared. But Rachel’s heart would still be breaking. Hearts don’t know reason!

 

“We just have to wait and see,” Santana wrapped an arm around the short girl’s shoulders, “No way of knowing if she’s going to come at you like an attack dog or if she’s going to just go all delusional face on you. Maybe pretend nothing ever happened? Probably start throwing in all these pointed cues like, ‘Isn’t it great we’re _gal pals,_ I can’t wait to set you up with Mike or whoever. Platonic, nonsexual friendship!’ Or… at least that’s how I would write it.”

 

Brittany wrapped her arm around the other side of Rachel, around her waist and then let the sad girl’s head fall to her shoulder. Brittany and Santana could be strangely comforting in times like these…

 

“Don’t put this in your story,” she mumbled into Brittany’s neck.

“Don’t worry, I won’t. You two are way past this stage in my fanfic, and like, almost proposing.”

“Is my proposal really cool?” Rachel asked, seeking good news.

“I had Quinn propose.”

“You were wrong,” Rachel said haughtily, eyes flicking up to Santana’s with judgement, “I’m clearly the planner in that relationship, and even if Quinn proposed it would be because I secretly guided her to which ring, what proposal song for the flash mob, and how many of our friends and family to invite.”

Santana was stunned. “Hot damn. You right.” 

 

——————-

 

 

Rachel didn’t have English class with Quinn, but she did see her in History. She walked in and immediately felt the girl’s stare, so she looked up at and back at Quinn, who was sitting in her usual seat. 

 

Rachel lingered by the door. Quinn shyly looked away and then focused deeeeeply on her textbook. So Rachel went to her seat and willed herself to _keep it together, Berry_. And damn. She sounded like Santana now.

 

She tried one discreet over-the-shoulder look, and saw Quinn pointedly not looking at her but staring fiercely into either the teacher’s eyes, her book, the clock, or the door. 

And this is how the whole day went. 

 

At lunch, Santana and Brittany came to sit with her Blaine, Kurt, Mercedes, Tina and Artie. 

“Hey, peeps.” Santana said, putting her and Brit’s lunch plates down. She peeked over at Rachel and mouthed: _You cool?_

 

Rachel nodded. 

 

They all proceeded to talk about song choices, homework, annoying things teachers or parents said…the usual.

 

_But Glee Club was different_. Rachel sat down and then felt someone touch her arm, gently. 

 

She looked over and it was QUINN. 

 

“Chapter 9.” She removed her hand, carefully. “We didn’t finish it.” 

 

Rachel was at a total loss for words so she just nodded awkwardly. _Don’t scare Quinn away, don’t scare Quinn—_

 

“Tonight?” The blonde asked. She looked hesitant… but also Rachel felt like she was being asked for something and it wasn’t just time and place.

 

_‘I would love for that.’ NO. Don’t say that, Rachel. It’s too eager!_

 

So she just nodded again.

Like an idiot.

 

And Quinn didn’t smile or make any face other than a blank one. She retreated back to her usual row in the back and crossed her legs. _Casual, keep it casual._ Rachel realized she was still staring so she quickly turned her attention back to Mr. Shue. 

 

—————————

 

 

Look. Quinn has self-control. She has a lot of control. She’s perfect, almostperfectmaybealmostperfect. Oh, but she’s so f*cked.

 

_“Hey.”_

_“Hey.”_

 

Rachel let her in and she accepted the snacks offered to her, because if she didn’t she’d look crazy eager and she couldn’t look like that. There was already a different energy tonight than there was the night from before and Quinn felt like she was on what a date was supposed to feel like. It was awkward, but there was this weird unspoken agreement happening and like, they couldn’t stop smiling at each other and being all whisper-y and staring into each other’s eyes…and she needed to _kill_ that particular energy. It was the right thing to do.

 

So she said something passively mean, which Rachel didn’t seem to notice. _Damn_. _Be meaner, Quinn!_

 

Instead, Rachel took the bowl of popcorn and the iced teas her dad had whipped up (her super nice, super chill Dad) and they brought them upstairs. Quinn made a point of sitting at the desk this time.

 

“You look nice,” Rachel said, looking at her outfit.

 

“Thank you.” 

 

‘ _I didn’t dress up for you or anything,’_ is what she would have said, but then she’d have Santana’s voice in her head and then her own voice about how defensive that sounded. And this whole thing was really starting to feel like a trap. 

 

What Quinn Fabray, the perfect Cheerio, should have said is _‘I know_.’ Because she’s always supposed to know how nice she looks. And Quinn had made sure to change out of cheerios uniform, and into something more attractive this time. For some reason she didn’t want to look like a post-practice mess in front of Rachel Berry…

 

“Let’s do this thing, and get it over with.” 

“Oh-uh, yeah. Ok.” Rachel got up and reached behind Quinn to get her laptop off the desk. Quinn inhaled sharply, but tried to ignore that suddenly she had to deal with Berry in her space. 

 

She let out a deep breath once the girl was (safely) back in her own zone. 

 

“Um, I’ll read first?”

“Yes.” 

 

Rachel decided to skip the part they were on last time. She wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea to bring it up again when it had…ended with them making out super hard on her bed and her close to begging Quinn to— _Nevermind_. _Shut up, Berry!_ Rachel scrolled through it.

 

“C’mon, Berry. What’s the hold up?” 

She gave a tight smile, “Almost there.”

“Good.” 

“It is.” 

“I know.” 

 

‘ _Q was riled up again. Maybe because her feelings were really getting to her.’_

 

“Stop.” 

 

“Pillow?” Rachel asked, concerned. She saw Quinn nod, so she grabbed her pillow and tossed it to the blonde. The girl didn’t scream into it, but she did hold onto it, tight. 

 

“Do you have anything harder in this house?” Quinn sounded increasingly annoyed, “Alcohol or something?” 

 

“Quinn Fabray!” Rachel chided. “We can’t drink under my parents’ roof.” 

 

“Ugh. Just keep going.” 

 

_‘Her feelings were really getting to her. It was harder and harder to ignore. Rachel was always around and stuff. And, when she walked into Brittany and Santana making out in the MIDDLE of her THEIR SLEEPOVER? She ran away, practically sobbing—’_

 

Rachel looked up from the laptop, for what now was becoming a familiar process of fact checking and story-verifying. Santana was full of approximations. And, biases.

 

“Well. That last part’s not true, but they did make-out like…right next to me. We had our sleeping bags out in the yard so that we could see the stars, and most of the night I was feeling like, I don’t know…” 

 

“Like a third wheel?” 

 

“Yeah. That. And when I felt them moving around to like… god. _Kiss._ I just pretended to be asleep.” 

 

“That sounds like them,” Rachel said, nodding. She then smiled and pointed to Quinn’s cross, “What about your religion? Did you ever plan on not being friends with them? I’ve wondered.” 

 

Quinn looked around the room. There were a bunch of photos of Rachel with her Dads where they all looked so happy. And, she didn’t really know how to answer Rachel’s question. 

 

“I didn’t think about it like that.” Quinn sort-of elaborated. Rachel gave her a look like, _go on_. And Quinn sighed, annoyed.

 

“I thought of it like… these two have a secret. And, I’d rather have two friends I can have leverage over, than a friend where I didn’t.” 

 

“Hmm.” 

 

“Santana and Brittany were popular and they were useful. Plus, they weren’t so obvious about it back then, so I wasn’t worried about them hurting my social status.” 

 

“I appreciate the honesty, Quinn.” 

 

It was strange for her to hear Rachel speak to her so formally again, but it was better than the mixture of disapproving faces and skeptical faces she’d just been giving Quinn during her whole, ‘I’m the master of popularity manipulating’ speech. 

 

_‘Maybe she was extremely jealous of what they had and it had saddened her. Maybe Quinn was such a closet case, the mere sight of two girls kissing was just enough to drive her wild—’_

 

Rachel sighed even before she got the whole thing out, it was rough. And Quinn clearly felt the same because she was face-diving back into her pillow to curse out Santana.

 

“GOD, I HATE THAT—” And a word that sounded a lot like it rhymed with ‘itch.’ 

 

“Bwahhsdhsdhhshudsjs.” 

 

“So you’re not ‘extremely jealous of what they had?’” Rachel smiled, already knowing the response was going to be…

 

“ _No._ ” 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you be jealous of anyone.” Rachel tilted her head a little, and looked amused at the idea of it. The Cheerio was relieved to know Rachel thought she was never jealous. She slowly looked back up at the brunette and smiled, though her face was covered in red markings from being pressed into the fabric so hard, Rachel thought she looked cute.

 

She also looked unfairly cute in her tight jeans and soft tee, and her recently washed-hair put carefully into a side braid, but Rachel wasn’t about to voice those thoughts. _Though_ , she did feel particularly underdressed being in her PJ shorts and an embarrassing, oversized sleep shirt with HOLES in it… Rachel would know and pre-empt such a thing from happening again next time. If there was a next time.

 

“Santana’s the _worst_. But go on.” 

 

They read and they read, and really it wasn’t so interesting. Quinn started rolling in circles in Rachel’s desk chair, and staring at the ceiling. Rachel’s legs were more interesting. _Stop that,_ she reminded herself _._ And her eyes didn’t really have anywhere else to look because she’d already scanned everything in the girl’s bedroom. Broadway posters, so many pictures of Barbara Streisand it seemed… unhealthy. _Likeee, so many old women in this room_! A whole section dedicated to costumes and props, many she saw in Glee. A bunch of candles with silly names, a microphone—because, of course.

 

“ _‘And, Rachel was mesmerized by the hazel eyes before her’—_ Quinn, are you listening?”

 

Her eyes caught a photo of Finn and Rachel’s stupid Photo Booth couple pictures and she rolled her eyes, before meeting Rachel’s. 

 

“Mm?” 

 

“Maybe, we need a different strategy.” 

 

“Yeah?” Quinn rolled the chair until she was at the edge of the bed in front of Berry. 

 

“You almost seem like…” Rachel’s forehead was creasing and Quinn smiled at that, “You don’t… want to read it?” 

 

“Or like, you didn’t come here to read it.” 

 

_Bingo_. Quinn thought. But then her other brain, the smarter one was like, _No. Not Bingo. Not bingo, Quinn!_

 

She could lean up right now and kiss her though. And like who would that really hurt? 

 

_If you kiss her, you’ll seem like the desperate idiot who can’t not kiss Rachel Berry and everything Satan-Lopez wrote about you will be 100% true. Quinn Fabray’s just a horny repressed lesbian who can’t keep her paws off Rachel Berry. She should be trying to kiss YOU._

 

Quinn frowned. Rachel watched the emotions play off the blonde’s face and couldn’t help but smile. She was confused about what was going on in there… but it was also pretty endearing to watch. 

 

“Let’s stop tonight. It’s getting late anyway.” 

 

“Mmmm… yeah.” _Kiss her_.

 

“See you tomorrow?” 

 

Quinn slowly (very slowly) got up and put the chair back by the desk. She also slowly went to pick up her stuff she’d brought over. She had to be cool and stay cool. She was Quinn Fabray and Quinn Fabray didn’t sweat stuff, or act foolish. No. No. No. She was better than all that.

 

Plus, like. It’s what God would want and stuff, right? 

 

“Um. Goodnight.” Quinn said, overly-lingering by Rachel’s bedroom door. 

 

“Goodnight, Quinn.” Rachel said, very politely. She tucked herself under the sheets, no longer watching the girl at the door. But, her returned pillow did smell like whatever perfume Quinn had put on before coming over tonight. It smelled nice. 

 

Quinn looked back again, before completely leaving. “Tomorrow? Another chapter?” 

“Ok… if you’re sure.” Rachel didn’t see why she’d want to come back when she could barely bring herself to listen to this chapter, but if it’s what Quinn wants, then alright.

“See you then.” 

“See you.” 


	7. 10/10

“So you didn’t kiss, but also, she didn’t kill you?” Santana stole a handful of fries from Brittany’s plate. The dancer looked sad, so Santana traded her a cookie for it, which cheered her right back up.

 

“No, she just came over.” 

“Can I join the Fabray-Berry book club where y’all read my shit, or?” 

“I don’t think Quinn would like that very much.” Rachel was pretty sure the time meant to be reading would be Quinn attacking Santana and war being waged, so no. Definitely not.

 

“It’s almost like…” Brittany said airily, “She’s being Not-Quinn.” 

 

Rachel looked confused, but Santana’s eyes lit up. Santana waved a fry in the air in front of them, “She’s onto something. I just don’t know what though.” 

 

“Me either, sorry Brit.” Rachel smiled at the girl and gave her one of her cookies too. She didn’t feel much like eating, and the way Brittany’s eyes lit up made her happy.

 

“She’s coming over tonight?” 

“Oh Berry! There’s your chance then—”

 

But the conversation had to pick-up again later when they have privacy again in the auditorium since everyone was arriving at the table—including Quinn. 

 

Glee was rehearsing their version of ‘In The Heights,’ which gave Brittany and Santana just enough time to sneak outside and keep talking.

 

“Tonight, you have to be hot.” 

“Sexy.” Brit confirmed. 

“How do I do that?” Rachel sort of knew in a Glee-preformance way, but they were asking her to be hot for a whole night and not just for the duration of _‘I’m too sexy for my shirt.’_ But taking her shirt off could be a way of getting Quinn’s attention too, who knows?

 

Santana turned to Brit and asked, “What does Quinn get a lady boner for?”

“She likes when Rachel sings.” 

“She gets turned on whenever they fight,” Santana added, “The celibacy thing is tricky though. I think it’s more of a ‘keep boys off of me!’ but is it also something that turns her on?” 

 

Rachel looked between the two, totally mystified. 

 

“What _turns her on?_ ” 

“Yeah, Berry. When you wanna hit on someone you should probably know what turns them on. And then be that thing. It’s dating 101. And Quinn’s the master of it, when she targets someone they’re doomed.” 

 

“With Santana, I just take my shirt off and ask her if she wants to make out.” 

That made Santana smile.

“And, it always works, but Quinn’s not like me.” 

“Quinn’s all… prickly.” Brittany said. 

 

Rachel felt more confused than when she’d asked for help in the first place. Maybe couples weren’t the best people to ask for hook-up advice, because she’s pretty sure if she just took her top off and asked Quinn to make-out, she’d get punched in the face and called a ‘troll’ or something.

 

“We’ll do some surveillance and see what we come up with,” Santana said, “Maybe her Rachel Berry wet dream is that you dress up like a cheerleader or something.”

“Maybe she’s a furry?”

“Brittany No!”

“No Brittany!”

 

————————

 

The perfume, the cute clothes, and the nice hair were all back and they were staring at her softly from the other side of her door. 

 

Rachel was prepared though. She looked good this time, and even had her dads help her pick out an outfit. But they did ask a lot of questions like… _Why is Quinn over here every night now, dear?_ And, she said ‘Regionals.’ As if that answered them, but Rachel had just realized it hadn’t. 

 

“Come in.” 

“Ok, I was anyway,” Quinn brushed past her shoulder, but not as roughly as she would in the hallways at school. And her voice was being argumentative, but kind of weird-argumentative.

“Do you want a drink?” 

“No.” 

“OK.” 

“Let’s go to your room.” The blonde said, brusquely. She was already sort of running to Rachel’s room too, and the shorter girl had to fast walk behind her, her heart beating fast at all this sudden Quinn-ness.

 

“We have to get it all over with, right?” Quinn said, trying to sound conversational. But, when they got in the room, she closed Rachel’s bedroom door. 

 

“Oh…” Rachel walked over and opened it, “Um. Open-door policy actually. Sorry.”

 

“But, we’re two girls, right?” Quinn said. Her eyes, challenging Rachel to say otherwise. 

 

Rachel awkwardly nodded and closed it again. 

 

“We can contain ourselves, I’m sure.” Quinn laughed but to Rachel it sounded pretty forced. She ignored it, and took a seat.

 

“I’ll read this time. Maybe it’ll help me pay attention.” 

“Go ahead.”

 

And she did. Rachel actually enjoyed giving her vocals a break, it was better for her to rest them for her singing tomorrow anyway. And she got to just lay back on her bed, close her eyes, relax and listen. And Quinn’s voice was really pretty. Just like Quinn was really pretty. 

 

_‘Q and Puck went on a double date with Finn and Berry at Breadstix, and both ignored the conversation as the boys boringly argued over an episode of ‘Top Gear.’’_

 

“They do do that,” Rachel said with a laugh.

 

_‘Finn shoved all the breadsticks into his mouth quickly before any of the girls could have any, and Puck used the empty plate to get them two more orders of them…’_

_‘Baby, sticks are on me tonight,’ He whispered in Q’s ear._

_‘They’re free.’ Quinn said back, unimpressed.’_

 

“And _that._ ” Quinn agreed, “Santana might get all of her stuff about me wrong, but she’s really capturing the essence of a date with Finn or Puck…”

 

“Probably because she’s been on dates with them too,” Rachel said bitterly.

 

_‘It was a real shame, that all the make outs they had with their boyfriends left them dead in the lady parts,’’_

 

Rachel rolled her eyes. She expected Quinn to make a face or comment too, but the girl stayed fixed to the screen. 

 

_‘Q couldn’t help but look at Puck and Finn and wish they weren’t here at all. She’d rather be doing Sue’s Saturday workout regime, or getting a bikini wax than sit here with these two bumbling idiots. Plus, she was tired of warding off Puck’s horny ass—it made her want to vomit almost as much as watching Finnept and the Dwarf kiss.’_

 

They read more and more chapters and made a good amount of leeway into the story. The funny thing was, Quinn didn’t screamed in a pillow once. Nor did she get up and pace the room angrily arguing with the absentee author like nights before. She’d get to a passage and get this sort of, weirded-out, tense voice but then bulldoze through it as swiftly as she could. And Rachel didn’t mind.

 

_“Oh._ ” 

 

“What, Quinn?” 

Quinn looked up at her, a bit panicked. “Chapter 16…”

“Let’s skip it.” 

“You said we can’t skip.” 

“Yeah, but… it’s chapter sixteen and Santana even said we should.” 

“Santana wrote about us and the whole school has already read it. We should read it.” 

 

As much as she was trying to convince Rachel, it sounded even more so like she was trying to convince herself. Quinn nervously handed the laptop over to Rachel and sat down next to her.

 

“I can’t read it out loud though.” 

“Understandable.” 

 

Rachel cleared her throat. 

 

_‘Rachel stuck her hand down—_ ” Rachel squeaked in surprise and stopped. “Oh god.” 

 

“What is wrong with us that we can’t just read it and get it over with?” Quinn asked. She stood up, off her chair, and nervously paced the room. “Why is this so… _hard_?” 

“Maybe I can just read through it very quickly then summarize it?” Rachel’s eyes met Quinn’s, her face still red and embarrassed. “I don’t think I can read it… to _you_.” 

 

“I’ll try,” Quinn came over and sat beside her. Then she scanned the computer, “ _Quinn licked_ —oh!”

 

Rachel hid her face in the blonde’s side. 

 

“I’ll rewind.” Quinn took a deep breath to compose herself. 

 

‘ _Rach, Quinn sobbed, I can’t see you with Finn anymore and not think about all the things we could have together. Pick me. Choose me. Love me!’_

 

“Ugh, she stole that! That’s from ‘Grey’s Anatomy’!” Rachel could not believe… Lopez’s nerve! Stealing from Shonda Rhimes, how dare she?

 

_‘Quinn kissed her desperately,’_ The real Quinn’s voice was a little shaky, ‘ _And tried to show Rachel how much she really cared for her. Loved her even. As weird as that shit is.’_

 

‘ _Rachel, come on. Don’t you see you deserve so much better? Finn’s an idiot, and he doesn’t care about you! I do!’ But Rachel didn’t know if she could trust her yet, the blonde had been such a pair of tori flip-flops the last couple of weeks. On and off, and on and off… So the glee club fanatic stared into blue eyes—‘_

 

“Green,” Rachel corrected.

 

‘ _And coldly said, ‘at least I know Finn will be there for me.’ Quinn said, ‘OH really? Can he do this—’ then she kissed the brunette.’_ Quinn rolled her eyes, “What an idiot.” 

 

Rachel laughed, “She either gives you all the moves, or _no_ moves. And nothing in-between. I don’t think Santana gets how seamlessly hot you can be.” 

 

“Wait, uh, wait,” Quinn put the computer down, “How… _what_ I can be?” 

 

Rachel leaned back on her bed, trying to appear nonchalant. (even though she was working very hard to do so.) 

 

“Well, you know… the other night. I don’t know if anyone’s ever told you this before,” Rachel was super-super hoping this wasn’t going to scare Quinn away. “But you’re a really good kisser.” 

 

Quinn looked away and nodded.

 

“What about me?” _Hint, hint_. Thought Rachel. 

 

“Y-you?”

“Am I…?” 

“Oh, uh,” Quinn wasn’t sure what to say or how to play this. 

 

“You were fine.” She said. 

 

Rachel’s happy expression dropped completely. _Shit_ , thought Quinn. _Too mean! Too mean._

 

“I mean, um,” Quinn stared at Rachel’s lips and then at the wall (the safe wall), “You’re a lot better than Finn or Puck.” 

 

“Ok.” 

 

Quinn stared back at the computer screen. She really, really didn’t want to read anymore of this (terrible) fanfic. 

 

“You…” Rachel begin, she then innocuously played with a few locks of her hair that she’d spent forever curling earlier that night, “Should…” 

 

“Should..?” 

“I don’t know,” Rachel shrugged innocently, “Teach me?” 

“Oh!” Quinn nodded slowly, thinking it over. _Was this safe?_

 

_Shut up, Quinn and kiss her!_

_But_ … 

 

Quinn leaned in closer. She hesitated. _Was this really a smart move though? What if the school knew? She’d be ruined._

 

But it didn’t matter, the brunette impatiently closed the distance, pulling the blonde against her passionately threading her fingers through her hair. Quinn let out a soft _umph_ against Berry’s lips.

 

But all too soon, Rachel broke away and glanced anxiously into hazel eyes. “I mean, we don’t have to—”

 

“No, uh,” Quinn pulled her back in, carefully stroking her cheek and staring deeply back into the lips she wanted to be tasting again, “We should.” 

 

“Cool.” Rachel grinned and happily pulled her in for another super _fucking_ amazing kiss that made Quinn’s lips tingle. A 10/10. 


	8. I'm verklempt

Lopez smiled, “I’m finishing it tonight.”

“What!?”

“What?!?” They both were shocked.

“I was just doing it for the fans anyway, I really lost interest after writing the sex scene way back in chapter 16. But I couldn’t leave the readers hanging! They wanted a wedding. And babies… which isn’t biologically possible but don’t think that stopped me.”

 

Santana gave ‘em an easy grin, “The children have the best… no, just kidding, they both have the worst parts of both of your personalities. Diva monsters, it’s realistic.” 

 

 

“Mama Telanovela has other things to write. Or not write. I think I’ll never write again.” 

“Hallelujah!” Teased Rachel. 

“Mazel Tov.” Quinn said, giving Rachel a playful bump with her elbow. Rachel beamed.

“ _You know mazel tov?_ ” she said, absolutely adoringly.

Quinn thought for a second, remembering something, “Today I was alll… verklempt, then I remembered I knew ‘mazel tov,’ so that my friend Rachel Berry would call me a… mensch?” 

Rachel stared her dead-on and said, “You are the cutest—pardon my french— _freakin’_ person I’ve ever met.” 

 

The praise sent the blonde into a blushing spell. She couldn’t conceal her half-embarrassed smile as she heard the admiring words.

 

“Gross, you two.” Said Santana. “This fanfic couldn’t be finished _soon enough_.” 

 

 

As soon as Quinn left for class, Santana roped Rachel back in. “Whatever holy work you’re doing, bless you, Berry. Cheerios drills have never been this easy…” 

 

Rachel shrugged, pretending not to know what she was talking about. But this didn’t work out in the end.

 

For later that day, when the two frenemies were making out against the bleachers, Lopez waltzed in on them.

 

Mama Telenovela clapped her hands together in a loud clap between each sentence, “I. FUCKING. KNEW. IT.” 

 

“Please,” Rachel begged. She looked into Quinn’s eyes and tried to hide her head in the girl’s cheerios jacket, as to not have to deal with Santana anymore. “I can’t.”

 

Quinn glared over angrily at her. A gesture that meant: _leave_. 

 

Santana obliged, but she walked backwards—never keeping her eyes off them. 

 

“You’re welcome, senoritas.” 

 

“Get out.” 

 

“See you at lunch.” 

 

Quinn rolled her eyes and freed Berry from her jacket. She looked down at the brown-haired diva and smiled. 

 

“Do you want to practice for sectionals back at your place later?”

 

“You mean ‘regionals’?”

“Whatever,” Quinn looked away, at the field, then back at her girl. She couldn’t keep the happy expression off her face. “Walk me?” 

 

Rachel put her fingers through hers. “Gladly.”

**Author's Note:**

> if fanfic had academia, I would be citing: https://skywarrior108.livejournal.com/955.html?page=5 for all those faberry moments early on in season 1 and 2.


End file.
